Overwhelm and Self-Forgiveness

Do you ever feel like there are too many things to do, you don’t know where to start, your brain is fried, and you can’t keep your eyes open? It happens to all of us - we have a big project or a lot happening at home, or we’re working on a startup, or we’re juggling any other number of things in our lives and it feels like something will drop at any moment. I no longer experience the level that I once did, but overwhelm is something I’ve struggled with for a long time.

When I was working on a slew of Broadway plays several years ago (and just starting therapy), I felt like I was always behind because there was so much to do and not enough time to do it. Everything was urgent, priorities were nearly impossible to discern, and it was an overall high stakes situation. When I started to feel paralyzed by the feeling, my therapist had me hold all of the pillows in her office for as long as I could. Eventually, I dropped them.

What she said next has stayed with me all of these years. “Ok, you dropped the pillows. Pick them up and start again.” The beginning of that statement “ok” meant that I had permission to drop them. And those two short directions that follow have allowed me a better understanding of how to manage overwhelm when it happens in my life.

First, I take a beat and practice self-forgiveness for feeling the way that I do. I give my mind and body a chance to reset; my favorite tactics are a good, long sleep, a killer workout, or a hot shower. And then I take a look at the to-do list and prioritize things based on deadlines and timeframes. When I take the time to give myself a break and use the information that I have to make the decisions required, I can navigate the overwhelm by attacking it strategically. Cheers to forgiveness when dropping the pillows and picking them up again!